Ketchup vs. catsup...which one's better? the real one...

            This is such a stupid argument and I don't even know why we're discussing it. However, even though it may be stupid, ketchup IS a serious matter. I got to thinking about this for a couple of reasons. 1. We have catsup at the food bank where I volunteer, not ketchup. 2. It's the main food group at our house. I have to get a bottle every time I go to the store. This brings me to the question catsup vs. ketchup..which is better and what's the difference? (ok, so that's 2 questions.) I'd like to conduct a study and find out what percentage of american households use ketchup as opposed to catsup. Yes, this is what I waste my time thinking about.  Like I stated, I am a ketchup snob. Our house is 100% real ketchup all the time. And Heinz. Any other brand or variation cannot and will not be tolerated. I'm not even this picky when it comes to what kind of detergent I wash my clothes or dishes with. To be fair, clothes and dishes don't come close to something as important as ketchup. So what is the difference? Does anybody even know? All I know is, catsup is inferior in every possible way and I have no idea why it's even still produced.  If you have any thoughts, please share because I would like to be educated. But the next time you go to the store ask yourself...ketchup or catsup? I hope you make the right choice...

                       *footnote*
                              I bet there's this one guy out there who wrote a strongly worded letter to the catsup people demanding that they continue to produce it when he found out they were going to switch over. And I say to him.."stop eating it! Come to the ketchup side!" Come to the ketchup....come to the ketchup....

Horton

                                  “Don’t give up! I believe in you all! 
                  A person’s a person, no matter how small! 
               And you very small persons will not have to die 
                          if you make yourselves heard! 
                           So come on, now, and TRY!” 
                                                                                  -Horton

              I love Horton. Besides my duck dynasty cup, this was my most favoritest christmas gift this year. And yes, favoritest is a word. Go ask Dr. Seuss...and Horton would totally say it. I saw him at Kohl's one day while mom and I were out shopping. I knew in that instant I had to have him. Unfortunately, I was suffering from negative cash flow that day, So I did everything in my power to get mom to get him for me. Begged and pleaded, beseeched and implored. I like the word beseech, by the way. I just looked it up and the definition is great.."to request earnestly". HA! there was epic amounts of requesting in earnest. Well, all of my earnest requesting was for not. I went home, Horton not in hand. Sigh...I don't know why it didn't occur to me at the time, but my mother has this nasty habit of remembering things you see, getting them when you are unaware and saving them for you for christmas. Behold! Horton! I got him after all! I love my Horton....


                *footnote*
                        I also found a halloween decoration back in early October I had to have. More pleading, more begging and more requesting in earnest....guess what I got for christmas? I have to be the only person I know that gets halloween stuff for christmas....

I suffer from BPK.....bad parking karma..

 

            It is an established fact that I hate people. I make no apologies. I make no attempt to hide the fact that I hate people. And bad parking karma does NOT help to endear them to me. In fact, I do believe I hate them more now. The recent holiday season brought out the worst of people and the worst of my already bad parking karma. You know where I'm going with this. It doesn't matter what errand I am trying to accomplish. It doesn't matter what time I go. day or night. day or the 3 o'clock in the middle of the night when I can rest assured that there will be no other human being in sight for miles. perfect parking karma will surely be at wal-mart awaiting my arrival. It's parking spot greeting me with open arms. Please, here..come...right this way. I insist! Ahhh..perfect parking karma at it's best!   WRONG!!! SO SO SO WRONG!!!  No perfect parking karma for me! The parking lots all look like this. everywhere I go. everywhere. All of them. Everywhere. All the time. Forever. Bad, bad, bad parking karma. This means I have to take the dead last spot somewhere along the border of Utah and outer Mongolia. I have to take a plane and 3 buses to actually get to the entrance of the store. "But why not just wait for someone to pull out of their space. Surely you can get a perfectly fine space with just a little patience", you say. Ahh yes. of course. But you'd be WRONG!!!! So so so wrong. This doesn't happen. ever. There are usually between 2 and 75 cars waiting for the space. Being blessed with bad parking karma, it guarantees I will be as far away as possible from every space available. forever. So you can imagine with 9 million holiday shoppers all trying to get the 4 available parking spaces in the state, my bad parking karma is kicked in to high gear.  Weren't we supposed to have those super cool flying cars by now? don't ever make me go shopping with you unless you're willing to drive me. I refuse to play their game.

                    *footnote*
                           From now on I'm just gonna batman my ass into every parking lot I go...with THIS:

   

Who's got bad parking karma now, bee-atches? you know you're getting the hell out of my way....that's what I thought. 

Vegas Adventures - almost a year later.

               I never did finish my series entitled "Vegas Adventures", so I'm going to try to pick up where I left off. If I can even remember now. This picture made me giggle. Talk about your ultimate photo bomb....

         Auntie and I were just casually cruising the strip, minding our own business, snapping pictures, not bothering anyone...(we learned it's best not to engage other tourists. They are drunk.) Just leave them alone and keep walking. Anywho, as I was saying, I was busy snapping away and didn't notice these 3 very happy tourists.(code for they-are-drunk) I broke my cardinal rule of not confronting said drunk tourists by inviting them to be in a picture. They not only agreed, but enthusiastically INSISTED (they-were-drunk) that I take their picture. They even made me promise to post it on the blog. I was beyond delighted and assured them I would be happy to accommodate their request. I even thanked them and called them my random vegas friends. It was fun to watch 3 very happy (drunk) tourists enjoying themselves. I continued to snap more pictures as they went on their merry drunk way. It makes for a great story and this had to be my favorite picture from the trip.....except for maybe Caesar wearing the cowboy hat...that was pretty funny.  And the bally's butt.  The ass I've always wanted, but fear I will never have...sigh...stupid food. 









          


               *footnote*
                             As you're cruising the strip, snapping pictures, minding your own business and not engaging the happy drunk tourists, may I also advise you to NOT take any cards that may be thrust upon you. There are creepy people that line the sidewalks just waiting to give you cards. Don't take them. Don't even look at them. Unless  of course you want to see naked girls and want them to come to your room tonight. In this case you will want to take all the cards you can get. I'm good, thanks.

Happy Happy Happy, Jack!

           Holy crap, I LOVE the show Duck Dynasty! Last year, my passion was all things civil war. This year it is all things duck commander. It should be no surprise, actually. A family from Louisiana, the south, the confederacy....you know. These 2 things aren't entirely unrelated. So of course it was a duck commander christmas. I got Phil Robertson's book, a duck dynasty calendar and Uncle Si's tea glass. Well, not his actual tea glass. I got my own. And a pink one, no less! 

      
        This was easily the favorite gift. Earlier this year, I got the pink camo blanket. Since I have everything else, I should probably get an actual duck call. They do make a pink one of those, too. But I don't get out duck huntin' too much. I'm just gonna stick to collecting all the other stuff and watching the misadventures of Phil and Miss Kay, Si, Willie, Jase and Jep. Now that's a fact, Jack! 


                 *footnote*
                        Phil's book, "Happy Happy Happy -My life and legacy as the duck commander" has been a great read. You don't have to be into the show or duck hunting to enjoy it. They are such an interesting family. I kind of want to be adopted. I'd have to eat squirrel brains and frog legs, though. And of course, ducks. Ducks, maybe....squirrel brains and frog legs?....not so much. 

twas the awful no good very bad day after christmas.

    Getting hit by a car while you're sitting in traffic is bad. Getting hit by a car while you're walking your dog is worse. Getting hit by a car while you're walking your dog the day after christmas is even way more worse than that. It's like the worst ever. The only thing worse would be getting hit by a car christmas eve or christmas day. Still, the day after christmas ranks pretty high on the suck-o-meter. Poor dad! This is exactly what happened to him. He's ok, but he suffered a broken knee and a couple of broken bones in his back.  My sister called to give me the news .."Now, don't freak out. Dad's ok, but he's in the hospital. He was hit by a car." AHHHHHHHHH! Don't freak out?? This is NOT how you begin a phone conversation. This is how you guarantee the person TO freak out, in point of fact. So anyway, this was quite the alarming event. And it kind of ruins your plans for a lovely christmas holiday. Bummer. 

               *footnote*
                    The above photo is an accurate representation of what dad looked like. IV's and tubes everywhere. And he even sported the bandage on his forehead. I think he even had that same look on his face. But, it's not all bad news. He gets crutches, a walker, and a fancy wheelchair out of it....score! 

Happy New Year!!

                 I'm not one for making new years resolutions, due to the fact that that they go something like this:

   1. "I'm going to lose weight this year" - Ya right, I like to eat. My butt represents 30 years of pies and fried crispy things and mashed potatoes and every wonderful homemade meal my mother has ever made. I wear my ass with pride. I like to eat. 
   
   2.  "I'm going try new things and/or do something I've always wanted to do" - Ya right, I am the world's laziest person. It would just be too much work. To this I say, meh. Lazy.

   3. "I want to be better organized and more financially responsible" - HAHAHAHAHAHA!! Oh, that's funny! HAHAHA! Oh boy! sorry....what were we talking about?

        So ya....I am the place where resolutions go to die. However, despite my resolve to not make any resolutions, I am making an exception. I'm determined to bring the blog back to life. I was alarmed to learn that my last entry was back in July. Time got away from me and I guess I just kind of forgot about it. It has absolutely NOTHING to do with my inclination towards laziness....nope. not at all. no way. never. Ok, so I got lazy. Let's see how well I do. I don't want to be the place where blogs go to die. 


         *footnote*
               Auntie can take credit for this resolution. I spent most of the night tonight getting caught up on her blog and she has inspired me to get back to mine. I'm impressed with her ability to be non-lazy and keep up on her posts. I say good form!